by Jason Rosencrantz
TNT Books 2014
Imagine a thirteen year old kid that reads a lot of Mack Bolan titles. Now imagine that he just figured out how to download butt stuff porn from the internet. Now imagine he opens a KDP account.
Taken in that spirit, you might like the Death Mercenary. Cheesy, lurid, amateurish, but with its own honest charm. And just short and cheap enough to be worth the time and money.
The plot - cat lover Calvin Jackson is the Death Mercenary, an assassin who works for the CIA at 10,000 TAX FREE dollars a kill, later changed to $100,000 TAX FREE - I didn't know 13 year olds had to pay taxes.
Mobsters kill a hooker. The hooker is the sister of one of Jackson's friends, and he promised to protect her. He's doing a great job so far. Jackson kills all the gangsters. He flirts with his cougar boss at the end for way too long, the end.
Not a whole lot of action, as only one guy fights back, but lots of sex, though not quite enough for this to be an attempt at erotica. Very by-the-numbers. The mob boss is Don Capone, the lackeys are Gonzo and Rat, the black stud is Jerome Washington, the lawyer is Shelly Silverstein, since Jewy McJewJew was already taken.
All told, though, worth my 99 cents.
HAH. I read this around the time it came out. I can only believe it is written purely as a parody of the genre, otherwise I weep for this poor fellow.
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