Warlock by Ray Garton

Warlock
by Ray Garton
1989 Avon

A 17th century warlock is propelled through time and space, followed by a witch-hunter, both landing in late 80s LA. The warlock seeks to put together three hidden pieces of a grimoire which reveals the true name of God, in order that he may read it backwards and undo creation. The witch-hunter teams up with a young woman on a road trip to stop him.

Goes way harder than the movie. The warlock is endowed with "Satan's member" which is his main murder weapon. Haven't seen the movie in a while, but I don't remember the yawning anuses and sagging vaginas of his victims. And I doubt there's a deleted scene of Julian Sands sucking eyeballs out of Mary Woronov's nipples.

Weakest with the banter in the dialogue, which I'm guessing comes straight from the script. Came out two years before the movie was released in America.

From Amazon

Seductions by Ray Garton

Seductions
by Ray Garton
1984, Pinnacle

An alcoholic teacher with the power of precognition stumble across a series of disappearances where the victim only leaves behind a pile of blood. Shapeshifting succubi/incubi that take the form of their victim's desire. Shades of Dead Zone meets The Thing and prefiguring Yuzna's Society with erotic body horror. Garton's first, lean and mean.

Available from Amazon

Lot Lizards by Ray Garton

Lot Lizards 
by Ray Garton
Mark V Ziesing, 1991

A group of vampiric lot lizards (sex workers who hang around truck stops) travel with a bestial queen vampire in the back of a truck driven by fat, sleazy trucker familiars, the Carsey brothers. Trucker Bill Ketter, a trucker turned reluctant vamp, hunts the group, finding them at a truck stop where his ex-wife and kids happen to be stranded.

Sleazy, violent, and fun. My only complaint is the short length, as there was a lot of room in the story to expand.

Available from Amazon

Darklings by Ray Garton

Darklings
by Ray Garton
1985 Pinnacle

A black worm falls out of serial killer's nose as he dies in the emergency room. Soon after, people begin pursuing their darkest violent desires. Splatterpunk with monster b-movie roots. The killings are very dark, though this peaks in the middle, and a good balance here of how much of the premise to explain.

Available from Amazon https://amzn.to/3ndfll4

Live Girls by Ray Garton

Live Girls
by Ray Garton
1987 Pocket Books

Glory hole vampire on Time Square. A down on his luck former vigilante magazine feature writer becomes obsessed with a peep show performer after getting a vampiric bj. His would be girlfriend gets sucked into a lesbian vampire relationship, and is helped by a journalist whose sister was killed by vampires.

One part eroticism to four parts sleazy nastiness, just the right ratio. Just enough to justify the obsessiveness without getting romantic. A fun ride as long as you don't worry about the vamps' master plan - unlike Lost Boys or Near Dark there's no romantic angle, and I don't know the endgame for turning every 42nd Street pervert.

Available from Amazon

Tie-Ins: Good Burger by Ray Garton as Joseph Locke

Good Burger
by Ray Garton as Joseph Locke
1997 Pocket Books

Keenan and Kel were a teen comedy duo on Nickelodeon, and Good Burger was a film based on a recurring sketch on the show All That.  I never saw the movie, but I remember at the time a reviewer raving that this was the return of the comedy duo and that Keenan and Kel were the new Abbott and Costello and would be the driving force of film comedy for decades to come.  That didn't happen.

The story has basic comedy film bones - two lovable losers work at Good Burger against the efforts of evil corporate Mondo Burger's efforts to shut them down.  I read this as a goof but it was surprisingly entertaining.  I say surprising because comedy almost never works for me in fiction.  It worked here because the gags and jokes come fast, while most comedy fiction telegraphs the jokes with long setups.  Here I can pace the timing to suit my own tastes, and I'm curious how the well the movie would do, though probably not curious enough to watch it.

The writing is geared towards young adults and has little more than dialogue and blocking, which works for the material.  I wouldn't think a lot of interior monologues and back stories would improve the pace.

You can check out the book for free at archive.org, and give Ray Garton some love at his kindle store - I promise I'll review a book he's proud of some day.